Have you ever wanted to do something, and to not do it, in equal measure? It happened to me this weekend, and it is an all too familiar feeling. I wish there really were do-overs in life. I would have a lot of them.
I didn't see the Pope. I am not quite sure why I wanted to, but I did. He was staying at a seminary, on my street, 1.2 miles away!
I tied myself in knots over how to navigate closed streets, crowds of strangers, and my failure to find company. I even had a nightmare about it, complete with overwhelming obstacles and a cast of ghosts.
Now that he is gone, and the window is closed, I see that I could have, quite easily, avoided the city, put my sneakers on, and hiked over to where he was staying to get a drive-by, close-up, in-person, pontiff peek.
The experience has left me pondering my shortcomings and looking for the gift in the disappointment. I am less disappointed about not seeing this leader of another faith tradition than I am about the role of anxiety in my life.
I will remember this the next time I want to do something, and to not do it, in equal measure.
Have you ever felt that way?
I didn't see the Pope. I am not quite sure why I wanted to, but I did. He was staying at a seminary, on my street, 1.2 miles away!
I tied myself in knots over how to navigate closed streets, crowds of strangers, and my failure to find company. I even had a nightmare about it, complete with overwhelming obstacles and a cast of ghosts.
Now that he is gone, and the window is closed, I see that I could have, quite easily, avoided the city, put my sneakers on, and hiked over to where he was staying to get a drive-by, close-up, in-person, pontiff peek.
The experience has left me pondering my shortcomings and looking for the gift in the disappointment. I am less disappointed about not seeing this leader of another faith tradition than I am about the role of anxiety in my life.
I will remember this the next time I want to do something, and to not do it, in equal measure.
Have you ever felt that way?
(I don't know who took this picture. Sorry...)